My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
