Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize
