Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
he thought i was a dude.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My vagina just clenched in fear
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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