I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
