he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
