last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize