She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
