that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
