You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
