Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers

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(616): U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers http://tfl.nu/yb16

Replies (4) Good night (779) Bad night (951)
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(586): View more from Michigan

So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is

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(586): So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is http://tfl.nu/xff6

Replies (3) Good night (704) Bad night (1201)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks

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(908): We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks http://tfl.nu/lwab

Replies (10) Good night (4229) Bad night (1506)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.

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(780): Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube. http://tfl.nu/uqzu

Replies (35) Good night (1241) Bad night (5517)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Hannah Montana > iCarly

(309): View more from Illinois

I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely

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(847): Hannah Montana > iCarly (309): I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely http://tfl.nu/uzzz

Replies (49) Good night (1339) Bad night (5178)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job

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(651): I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job http://tfl.nu/40rf

Replies (62) Good night (6585) Bad night (1956)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.

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(413): They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket. http://tfl.nu/y613

Replies (23) Good night (4654) Bad night (2467)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.

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(703): I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU. http://tfl.nu/rhle

Replies (16) Good night (5393) Bad night (1124)
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(519): View more from Ontario

I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?

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(519): I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen? http://tfl.nu/tjza

Replies (20) Good night (6156) Bad night (975)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

Dibsssss

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(570): Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again (1-570): Dibsssss http://tfl.nu/o6dy

Replies (11) Good night (2073) Bad night (655)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.

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(615): You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it. http://tfl.nu/hvow

Replies (4) Good night (1678) Bad night (536)
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(702): View more from Nevada

By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set

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(702): By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set http://tfl.nu/1rax

Replies (12) Good night (1300) Bad night (840)
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(907): View more from Alaska

I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter

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(907): I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter http://tfl.nu/wvk4

Replies (13) Good night (660) Bad night (529)
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(693): View more from

You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml

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(693): You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml http://tfl.nu/qfop

Replies (4) Good night (310) Bad night (500)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed

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(508): all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed http://tfl.nu/18hn

Replies (4) Good night (586) Bad night (256)

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