I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
