I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize