Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
