What a fucking waste of an outfit
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize