i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
