she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
