I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize