i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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