So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
