is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
