the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He? As in you personified your dick?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
