either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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