Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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