Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
