Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize