I think i peed on brittanys purse
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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