My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
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so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
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There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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