Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
