So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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