I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
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