Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
