I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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