Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
