My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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