Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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