I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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