How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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