dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
