Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Joe is yelling at the trees again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): Joe is yelling at the trees again. http://tfl.nu/dpjn
  Replies (26) Good night (3888) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty. http://tfl.nu/51bx
  Replies (13) Good night (545) Bad night (3264)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo. http://tfl.nu/gbo1
  Replies (44) Good night (2362) Bad night (5255)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over. http://tfl.nu/tn8v
  Replies (9) Good night (1077) Bad night (3363)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major http://tfl.nu/y5g5
  Replies (18) Good night (1309) Bad night (5355)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!" http://tfl.nu/jby7
  Replies (37) Good night (18795) Bad night (1231)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends http://tfl.nu/8jwh
  Replies (7) Good night (2901) Bad night (957)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down. http://tfl.nu/88lm
  Replies (4) Good night (997) Bad night (2161)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either http://tfl.nu/wksp
  Replies (4) Good night (798) Bad night (2551)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far. http://tfl.nu/eadn
  Replies (13) Good night (3472) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table http://tfl.nu/sh7s
  Replies (5) Good night (1835) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch http://tfl.nu/7p4s
  Replies (2) Good night (2386) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Boobs speak an international language.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Boobs speak an international language. http://tfl.nu/m73t
  Replies (7) Good night (1395) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery. http://tfl.nu/4491
  Replies (4) Good night (1220) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age (612): Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity http://tfl.nu/l9mx
  Replies (6) Good night (863) Bad night (458)

Randomize