Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.

(330): View more from Ohio

I don't know you.

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(570): So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas. (330): I don't know you. http://tfl.nu/3wzi

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(312): View more from Illinois

Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex

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(312): Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex http://tfl.nu/n8r5

Replies (20) Good night (4427) Bad night (569)
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(406): View more from Montana

Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass

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(406): Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass http://tfl.nu/uf2h

Replies (20) Good night (2300) Bad night (1397)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.

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(612): I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate. http://tfl.nu/beue

Replies (40) Good night (1348) Bad night (7211)
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(703): View more from Virginia

just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.

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(703): just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking. http://tfl.nu/uhxv

Replies (15) Good night (1759) Bad night (5351)
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(563): View more from Iowa

I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.

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(563): I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it. http://tfl.nu/ttul

Replies (33) Good night (1238) Bad night (3067)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.

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(860): We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun. http://tfl.nu/8k8b

Replies (20) Good night (2201) Bad night (2812)
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(240): View more from Maryland

The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.

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(240): The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week. http://tfl.nu/o9bn

Replies (13) Good night (3013) Bad night (1632)
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(706): View more from Georgia

Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out

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(706): Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out http://tfl.nu/wj5z

Replies (32) Good night (1910) Bad night (6068)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex

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(732): he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex http://tfl.nu/opy4

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(416): View more from Toronto

I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.

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(416): I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison. http://tfl.nu/ptp6

Replies (1) Good night (1265) Bad night (455)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.

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(202): We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer. http://tfl.nu/6uoe

Replies (2) Good night (1164) Bad night (385)
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(573): View more from Missouri

Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?

(816): View more from Missouri

Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.

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(573): Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls? (816): Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do. http://tfl.nu/ewbx

Replies (2) Good night (1272) Bad night (415)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn

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(201): so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn http://tfl.nu/00rd

Replies (4) Good night (454) Bad night (746)
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(951): View more from California

It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.

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(951): It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me. http://tfl.nu/jm52

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