Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
