this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
My vagina is very pro this idea
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