possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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