So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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