whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
