i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
