even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
