His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
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