This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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