I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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