Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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