I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
